Sunday, November 22, 2009
In the moment before I give the gift, I hesitate, reconsidering. It’s nothing really and he is after all God—but I so wanted something to give. I know he will not laugh at my gift, but will he like it? Will he want it?
It’s nothing really. Just my treasures. Nothing of value. A few hopes, some dreams. Worthless by man’s measure. My plans, my future. It’s not much to offer. It would be easier to keep it for myself. But I do not trust myself, and I have nothing else to give.
The hesitation ends.
The gift is given. One look at His face. I cannot regret the decision.
Saturday, November 07, 2009
Categorize me in the group that didn't make it if you will, but for the record, I am content.
My life is made up of a job I don't love, but will do. I could do a lot worse, and there are days I genuinely feel I'm making a difference. The rest of my time is spent with a six year old who is quite possibly the most important thing in my life. I live with my sister, brother-in-law, and two beautiful nieces, six-years and four-months old. My parents live just down the road. My brother lives 3 hours north. He's one of those rare exceptions who will probably actually achieve his ten year and love it.
Is this the life imagined for my self when I was in college? Not even close. The only thing that has remained consitant about my life is the ever presence of God. There are things that I still want out of life. I won't be living here forever. I'll find a better job. But right now, I am happy. God is so good. I've decided I'm not going to wait for life to happen. This is my life. Right now, it's about living in the moment, making memories. If you've seen my facebook photo albums, you've seen record of those memories.
Don't get me wrong. I'm not ditching goals and planning. I'm embracing this mindset hopefully less in the irresponsible, faithless aspects and more in the choosing contentment and enjoyment areas. For now. this is my goal.