Tuesday, February 19, 2008

Pet Peeves

I have taken great care with this list. So before I write them out for you, I need to explain a few things. There are far to many irritating forces in this world to list them all as pet peeves. The boundaries must be narrowed and refined.

1)Pet peeves shared by everyone cancel each other out. They are not pet peeves, thy are commonplace nuisances. Of course I hate hair in the sink and runs in my nylons (which by the way I no longer have to wear--and there was much rejoicing). Of course I hate soggy bread and mosquitoes, but so does everyone else. It doesn't qualify.

2)People are not pet peeves. People are annoying, and they do stupid things, but they are not pet peeves. Calling them such would just admit I was too lazy to identify the specific characteristic which annoyed me in the first place.

3)Pet peeves should not include moral issues. Those are more accurately called standards or convictions. Listing them off as pet peeves usually fulfills an ulterior motive. ie: I hate gossiping; therefore, I believe I am above gossip. I hate legalism; therefore, I believe you are legalistic/Pharisaical. You get the idea. Don't go there.

But here are a few legitimate pet peeves.

1)Amazing actors appearing in dumb movies
2)A book cover that doesn't match book's contents
3)Towns lacking coffee shops
4)Libraries that only allow you to check out 3 books
5)Arriving at a book sale after RuthAnn and Joanna have already cleaned out everything good
6)Museums featuring crooked art work (excluding anything found in the modern art gallery)
7)Limp handshakes

4 comments:

jaron said...

Can I just second the whole Ruthann and Joanna thing - seriously, I thought that I could do the whole clearing the room thing - but, man, they are really good.

weedeater said...

How 'bout typos? "...far to [sic] many irritating..." :)

Anonymous said...

Okay, so its funny. Cuz I called and talked to you tonight about my library, and books, and I hadn't read this post yet. Weird.... *think: the Twilight Zone theme song*

Anonymous said...

I have a blog post draft entitles 'pet peeves' which I am continually working on and so may never get around to posting. So I'll put a few here.

Headphones which suddenly stop working out of one ear, and you have to get the cord just so, but then if you move, it's gone again.

People who blow/sip/slurp their tea/coffee/hot water in ennunciated, methodical fashion, even if (the most peeviest part!)it's already cold.

Watching movies in a chronically interupted fashion. The worst is watching a movie your younger brother is not allowed to see, and him walking through the room every 5 minutes (on purpose!) so you have to stop, lest you be chastised by your parents for 'letting him see such abominations.'

Little children in places they should not be.
- Movies rated pg-13, sans parents, no less.
- Artsy museums.
- Any sort of performances.
- Church services where it's obviously not 'their' time, and their peers are all scattered, but their parents want to teach them how they are supposed to behave in a few years (there's a reason it's a few years away).

There are a very few children who are well-behaved enough to be taken to such places, but to those who think I'm talking about their children, take my advice. Never assume your children are the exception and the world will be a better place.